ugh it's 2 in the morning and i couldn't fall asleep because frankly i'm just not tired and all i can think about is how i want to go type stuff on my computer and have it fly through space to this thing and i have to wake up in ten hours and i'm complaining. i swear i could sleep for FIFTY hours but if i am then woken up with an alarm clock of some sort i will still feel tired and unhappy about the whole thing. i have to wake up to get to ONE CLASS because i can't be sure the notes will be available to me online and it's at 1pm and that's great, except if you're now accustomed to sleeping in til 12:30. and all that gas and time getting ready and driving and wasting fifty minutes and blah blah. how silly this schooling thing is.
this thing plagues me when i'm trying to go to sleep: i like the fan on moderately high because i love being cold and wrapping up in something (like my wonderful goose down comforter) but the upper region of my throat starts.. i don't know if the word is hurting, because it's more just uncomfortable.. because the cold air. a very mild version of when you run and it's cold outside and your throat burns. but i can't sleep with it. so i try to put my hand near my mouth to block it a little but then i get hot, and then i try to kind of put my face a little in my comforter and then i get claustrophobic. i sometimes get up and drink hot tea but then it just bothers me again later on. i don't know what to do.
and my poor pajama pants are tearing on one leg, irreversably (unless of course i try to do some sewing) - and i could either try to fix them which seems like only delaying the problem, or buy a new pair.. but i love this pair. this pair is my loyal and trusted friend. i hate how "pair of pants" is singular.. or even how "pants" is plural.. so it's one pant plus one pant? two legs but one complete entity.. it's annoying.

the greatest time to be outside is right after a storm and right before the sun starts setting. everything has this incredibly strange yellow glow to it. the light is all different. you can't tell if the colors are more defined or dulled. it's really weird but really interesting.. you can always see the glow from inside through closed blinds. look for it someday.

i'm tired of american flags and "God Bless America" and "America Stands Together" and all that. stop it. we're not great because we're american. we're great because we're people. today someone said "it's great to see everyone together, being american, no matter what race, no matter what nationality, we're all just being american". "no matter what nationality, we're all just being american". uh huh. stop with the borders between countries. the people at the beginning of all this said it best: this is not a threat against america, it's a threat against the free world. let's work together as a world instead of just a country. i'm tired of it. all we're doing is seperating people. a lot of us are differentiating between the terrorists and the arabic peoples, but some of us aren't. it's not the taliban vs america. it's people who want to kill vs people who don't want to kill. i wish we could just see it like that. it'll be interesting to see what countries take an active effort in helping us here. nostradamus prophecies say that france will prove to be our greatest ally, so watch out for that. it's strange how they're overlooked and instead seen as wimpish. but then they did so much to help during the american revolution and then in the vietnam war. it's interesting.

oh i saw the greatest movie last night called "Steal This Movie" with vincent d'onofrio (who i'm going to start a thing with) and janeane garofalo and the guy from Grounded For Life and The Tao of Steve and that guy's sidekick from GFL and kevin pollack. it's about abbie hoffman, a revolutionary during the 60s. 60s politics gets me so excited, i would've loved so much to have lived then. it tells his story of how he sort of started this post-hippy group, the yippies, and how they helped end the placement of american troops in vietnam and during all that got massive amounts of anti-war folks together and formed a circle around the pentagon and tried to make it levatate, which i thought was so great and hilarious. and his downward spiral when the fbi and cia were after him and he had to go into hiding for 7 years and how he got back into politics in his 50s.. it was just so so so interesting. this guy was the most passionate, stir crazy, grandiose, sexy, loud, powerful thing you've ever seen.. rent it just to watch him work a crowd. one of the greatest lines was about how, yes, they were all crazy and drugged a lot of the time and dirty and scary and unorthodox, but they were RIGHT. that's good stuff right there. i plan on reading his book, "steal this book".

oh i'm even less tired now but maybe i can make it. thinking of abbie has gotten me a little excited. i'll make do. let me think of a quote to end on...

"Today we announced the death of MONEY!" -steal this movie

lovemelo