the acid in orange juice never fails to give me heartburn but i love it so much that i just keep drinking it. that's love.

well it seems i'm running into movies about threesomes everywhere i turn.. first there was Splendor, a little silly, but it made me believe. then Threesome, (I FINALLY SAW IT!), both about a girl and two guys.. which the more i think about it might actually be.. nice. i mean hell, i've always kind of been turned on by two good-looking guys together.. hm. well in these movie situations it almost certainly wouldn't work, though threesome had a completely different kind of reality to it, no fantasy there.. it might could happen that way.. and before that The Mating Habits of the Earthbound Human. so much sex. jesus. so now i'm just feeling all weird. where are people when you need them? i'd go on but unfortunately i can't shake the knowledge of who gets to read this thing. we need to get over that.

friday i roller skated (the middle school hangout) and then went to steak n shake (the high school hangout) with niko and becca and it was all delightful, though i'm an awful skater and i felt like a burdon for most of the night.. but talking was wonderful. i'm so glad to be past that stage where three girls can't hang out together without worrying two will pair off and leave one. that's been a rule for so long. it no longer stands. how nice. ;)

and saturday was the night of ::metal sign here:: and finally seeing *alan* and juan and frank and john and will and a wonderful surprise of axel. oh and let's not forget tyran. good god, tyran. that kid still gives me butterflies. he's still two years younger.. i've always been fascinated with the mrs. robinson game. hm. that boy is unstoppably gorgeous AND now dresses precisely how i would dress him.. what a bizarro-world. so, melody, what was it like having all the significant male figures in your life in one room? well i'd say it was something straight out of bizarro-world, ed. will. he still wears the same damn cologne.. i kept noticing people leave him for other people, something that happened/happens to me plenty so i kept almost walking over and discussing our situation and making an evening buddy. well i never got around to it. i'm afraid i might've eventually left him for someone else.

chilis is i think my most significant high school hangout, and it was very nice to be there with the people that matter. and finally to be around alan in a state where he'd rather spend more time with you than go home earlier and sleep. i guess it took college and time away. i think he acted the way i've always acted around him. it was so strange but wonderful finally getting it back. such happiness at simple little moments in the car when he said "i've missed you" and i was so kind of taken aback to say it back right away.. i kept thinking "this is how it should've always been". i've tried over the past several weeks to make him less important, but he's just.. not.

i encourage all to go see Apocalypse Now Redux at the enzian or at least go rent the original, it's amazing, should be required viewing. feel that chill when brando whispers "the horror.."

lovemelo