let's try this again. i'm at the end of my first day at school and i've been freezing and slightly wet for the past, like, six hours. never wearing sandals to school again. i've been walking around with socks on underneath my sandals, and feeling stupidly self-conscious about that like someone will point it out to a friend like white after labor day which doesn't even really exist... how bizarre. speaking of bizarre. what a delightfully bizarre film i just saw in Women in Film. Orlando, directed by Sally Potter who i could've sworn directed Jesus' Son, another delightfully bizarre film, but didn't, it was Alison Maclean, and now i'm disappointed. she did do The Man Who Cried, tho, too weird for its own good, and The Tango Lesson, a movie that's been on my list for years, can't quite remember why. and you know that when i say list i mean it literally. that's one of the first ones and it doesn't seem to be dwindling, only growing because i keep adding to it and ceasing to want to watch the old stuff. so we'll watch lots of interesting movies in women in film and the trade off is we must give a ten minute presentation at the end of the semester JESUS GOD FUCK and i very nearly dropped it just for that but dammit.. maybe i'll just do it.. or maybe i'll pull the fire alarm.. or run away screaming.. or get pregnant and have an abortion the day before and come in crying to the prof about women's rights and men are scum and she'll automatically pass me.. um. and the professor is this older german lady who says she's a filmmaker and voila i've looked her up on imdb.com and there she is.. ula stockl is her name.. fascinating. her films are all tiny unknowns and range in length dramatically from 67 minutes to 205 minutes.. fascinating. maybe she'll turn out to be my woman filmmaker mentor. my italian film professor is this slightly british 50ish gay man.. slightly british, i know, but the accent goes in and out i swear, bizarro world. he is amazingly uncertain of himself, won't look anyone in the eye and instead gazes at the back wall like it's an old friend, poor chum.. he lulls us into slumber and i fear for my health now that i know how much time i'll be spending with him. these two classes are in the same FUCKIN FREEZING classroom in the communications building.. i will bring two sweaters, socks and tennis shoes, and possibly a scarf every tuesday, my god. it's must be literally 50 degrees. so i escaped italian film because i sit myself in the back of classrooms by instinct and then couldn't read the damn subtitles.. it's on reserve in the library, i'll find it. so i ran outside into the warmness and it was raining but not too hard so i went out with my umbrella and got my legs and feet soaking wet, great, and landed in the computer lab in classroom 1 just in time to start typing this report and have the power shut off in the building just long enough to lose it.. no big deal tho, it was kind of exciting. the sun finally came out and i sat and baked and dried out, finished A Home at the End of the World, and had that great just-finished-a-book feeling as i drifted thru the crowd back to class.. it's so interesting that there can be so much going on within us that no one around us knows about. the day started at 8 this morning with an early french 2 class and guess what! i've dropped it! yea, i really didn't want to chicken out like that but i was in wayyy over my head and i didn't want to drag people down with me.. see it's for their benefit. so i've signed back up for a french 1 that makes me now go to school every day of the week which SUCKS but c'est la vie and all that. unfortunately it's with the same obnoxious prof i had this morning.. mrs. kyprais who IS french and loves to speak it incessantly while we all blink and watch her.. goddamn you kyprais. i miss mr. wilhelm more than any of you will ever know.