jenn told me a while back to make a list of all the things i want to do before i die.. as a sort of mapping-out-your-goals assignment.. not exactly meant to set you on the track to achieving them, but to take the first step and acknowledge them.. there's supposed to be 100, but that seems like an awful lot.. i can only think of about 20 off the top of my head. but i want to start putting them here because this is the easiest place to record them when they first pop into my head.

so there's the obvious:
be "in love" with someone who is "in love" with me
go to italy
find a career that makes me happy
find a way to help the world in some way
skydive
own a great dane
lose weight.. maybe
get over body image issues - definitely
get over sex issues
HAVE SEX
have great sex with several partners so i can get the feel of being a "sexually active individual in the world"
hang-glide
figure out some better hair removal system
get over my fear of public speaking - jesus
start saying and doing the things i want to be saying and doing
stop biting my cuticles
stop biting my nails to the point where it's unhealthy
get fingers out of mouth altogether
tie in to body image issue, but start carrying myself with more confidence
floss
exercise in some way
go outside more, somehow
start going to movies with other human beings
maybe go to less movies..er..rent less.. cut a little into movie watching to go out and find new enjoyment
always be the same person to every person, as much as possible anyway
stop procrastinating, so much
resolve mother issues, somehow
stop feeling guilty
either find a femininity or masculinity and stick with it, or accept myself the way i am
discover what needs to change and change it and discover what shouldn't be changed and accept it
somehow
do not succumb to peer pressure, assert myself and my own beliefs in all situations
don't become an alcoholic or a drug addict or some kind of pervert or any such thing that takes hold of you and is bad for you
go to alaska
live in boston
meet Uncle Bob
make my peace with my grandmother
stop getting so upset about religious and political differences
make a political difference - "be the change you want to see in the world"
finish my gandhi biography
go to india
have a wild affair with some celebrity that i've been obsessed with
do not have children, under any circumstances, but do not abort any, do not become pregnant in the first place, and be a wise and influential aunt to jordan's children and other people's children
own lots of animals, but particularly a horse
see New York City at least several more times and maybe run into kurt vonnegut or woody allen on the street.. in the fall
go to paris
don't become too cynical

well i've lost my train of thought.. and this has become not so obvious and a little long, not as hard as i thought, which i should've guessed... ok off then.